On the Eve of My 41st Birthday



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On the eve of my 41st birthday I feel giddy with excitement. You see, for me getting older is the objective in life, I mean the point is to see how old we can get…Right?!41st birthday

I never shy away from the taboo question…how old are you?  In fact I’m damn proud of what I have done in my 41 years, so yeah, I answer the question with a big toothy smile because as cliché  as it may sound I am living my best life. I want to celebrate getting OLDER!! I want to let my white curls down and be joyful that I have been gifted a beautiful blessed life.

Sooooo to celebrate my 41st birthday I am going to spill all my “lifestyle secrets” in hopes that you darlings will be inspired.  Be forewarned my “secrets” are hardly “secret.” Just the guidelines I live my life by.

I think we need to begin with the most important thing, SELF LOVE:

Don’t laugh but everything I’m about to say will probably sound like a lame ass self-help book. To set the stage for my day, I start each morning with rituals that make me happy. Happiness is youthful, beautiful and age defying!!! For me, it’s as simple as getting ready in my cute outfit followed by playing with makeup and a lovely cup of tea…I mean shucks anything that happens in my day after this is gravy!!Self Love

It took me most of my 20’s to learn this crucial fact: It’s important to show myself love each and everyday!! Believe me, it took some major practice. I’ve been a parent my entire adult life. Guys I did not know HOW to put myself first let alone what loving myself even looked like. Thank you, next…to my EX because without that break-up I would still be back there giving to everyone in my life except ME.  So how do I love me??? I do that by dating myself. Simple. I get dressed for me, layer on moisturizers and serums for me, and nourish my body with whole foods ALL FOR ME.  Loving yourself beams from the inside out!!  It’s the kind of beauty that no other person can take from you. The attitude. The confidence.  It can make you more beautiful than any dress ever could.

My Hippy-Dippy tonics, rituals, and plant based diet, WHAT I EAT:

As I said youthfulness comes from the inside out.  What can I say darlings, wait for it…you are what you eat!! If you want to look and feel youthful and vital then you have to eat whole foods. End. Of. Story. You have to give your body the tools it needs to regenerate healthy cells for a prolonged life. I know what some people say to this, “You mean I have to give up xyz?”  No, of course not, but then don’t wonder why you feel tired all the time even though you’re sleeping 7-8 hours a night or why your body aches or feels bloated for no apparent reason or why you keep getting pesky colds every other month.

Nutrition Anti-agingPeople ask me all the time how I get a flat stomach. I promise you it’s 90% diet. Your body is a reflection of what you’re eating as much as it is what you’re not eating!!!  Our bodies are perfectly designed machines. We are built to have a long lifespan full of productivity for the most of it. It is through food that we maintain that productivity. I’m talking eating the rainbow in the form of raw veggies. If you eat meat, it’s choosing to only eat lean free range grass fed, organically raised meats and source fresh wild caught seafood. It also means skipping sugary, processed foods in favor of natural sugars and incorporating good for you fats and carbohydrates. I eat a plant  based diet. I listen to my body. It tells me when to eat a big raw salad or a bowl of hot fluffy quinoa with some sauteed veggies or snack on dried mango. I know this sounds like some hippy-dippy shit, but guys food is one of the few things in our lives that we can control!!! And it’s for the betterment of our well-being.

Let me tear a page out of my daily dietary life:

  • I begin each day with a big glass of hot water with lemon & ginger or apple cider vinegar, followed by a big glass of wheat grass water.  The water of life is actually WATER guys. I try to rehydrate my cells first thing in the morning before I even take a shower. In all, I drink about a gallon of water each day.
  • Hot cup of black tea with raw local honey and steamed oat milk
  • Intermittent Fasting;  Something I do not generally share is that I fast every morning with my first meal being between 12 – 1 pm. I generally eat between the hours of 12-6/7pm. Most days I have a nuts or something around 8 pm before I go to sleep.
  • Lunch: Big bowl of seaweed, mushroom, and broccoli along with a cup of miso soup and 3 homemade veggie dumplings
  • Snack: Freshly popped avocado oil popcorn seasoned with, salt, garlic powder, nutritional yeast, and chili oil.
  • One bottle of kombucha
  • Dinner: 3 Veggie and Turmeric tofu tacos

When I am in town I love to prepare food for myself. For me it’s a luxury to be home making my own food so I never take it for granted or look at it as a chore.

Buzzing and On-The-Go, PRODUCTIVITY

If nutrition is on the left side of longevity than surely productivity is on the right.  I’m bundling in work, exercise, and engaging in life into this category. Anti-Aging and ExerciseThere is a direct correlation with having a satisfying quality of life and productivity.  Call me crazy, but I love being busy and on-the-go. It keeps me buzzing with energy. I’m keeping this body going like a teenager as long as it lets me. I’m sure there will be a time in the far off future that I will slow down, but until then watch out ‘cuz here I come!!  No can one can tell me I’m physically incapable of taking on pretty much any task!!

Potions, creams, and serums aka SKINCARE

Finally we have arrived at what you really want to know about, my skincare-isms.  It will not surprise you that I use “clean beauty” products. I believe that you can make a difference in the appearance of skin through a vitamin rich diet, active productive lifestyle and YES with great natural skincare.  

Skincare RoutineI do my best to use plant based non-toxic skincare because just like food I want to be able to identify each ingredient that nourishes my oily skin.  The beautiful part is never before have there been soooooo many top shelf, effective clean beauty brands available.

  1. WATER My number one skincare product is not a product at all, it’s water…drink it!!!  Lol!!!
  2. CHLOROPHYLL followed very closely by wheatgrass water.  Chlorophyll is like liquid sunshine for your cells.  Sorry if you’re tired of me saying this, but what can I say it is!!  You guys ask me what I do for my glowing skin well this is IT. I drink it everyday for the last 8+ years.
  3. SUNSCREEN I wear sunscreen everyday, even on cloudy rainy days.  No matter your skin tone you need to use protection of spf 50.  Sun is the number one skin destroyer, degrading your skin at an alarming rate, leading to premature aging and wrinkles.  I currently use Kiss My Face Face Factor spf 50
  4. CLEANSER It is so important to use a hydrating yet effective cleanser.  I am OBSESSED with my new Warming Honey Cleanser by ISClinical.  After massaging it into my dry skin, it warms up quite nicely. It gently breaks down makeup and excess sebum (the main ingredient in your skin’s natural oils) while leaving my skin fresh.  Not to mention it contains all of the lovely honey ingredients that are truly beneficial for maintaining radiant skin.
  5. TONER is an important step to help balance the ph of my oily skin.  I have been loving Raspberry Vinegar Toner by Cocokind Skincare for a while now.  I use it at night right after cleansing my face and in the morning in place of a cleanser. So I do not wash my face in the morning only warm water from my shower then toner.
  6. MOISTURIZER For years I have used Bee Yummy and only recently began using Perlier Royal Elixir moisturizer. The holy grail ingredient found in both products is Royal Jelly.  Royal Jelly is what the queen bee is fed to sustain and extend her life well beyond that of the worker bees. So yeah, my skin deserves as much royal treatment as possible.
  7. EXFOLIATE I use a physical defoliator two to three times per week to deep clean my pores.  I believe exfoliation keeps my skin youthful-looking and helps prevent breakouts.  My current faves are:

    *Kora Organics Turmeric Face Mask/Exfoliator

    *Cocokind Sea Moss Exfoliator

    *Sisley Buffing Cream

  8. OIL Fact: Oily skin can actually be “dry” and lack proper hydration. It’s an easy mistake to make since on the surface you see oil and you think, oh my skin doesn’t need a moisturizer or any additional “oil.”  The reality is, oily skin needs proper moisture balance just as all skin does. Neglected, it will lead to more oil production, making your skin appear even oilier!!  If you have oily skin like me, dry oils can actually be very good for you.  I have a rotation of 3 dry oils. One I use exclusively at night and the other two I apply very lightly in the morning (not together, I choose one or the other).  No matter what time of day I use them, they are final step in my skincare routine before eye cream. The oil “locks in” my other products creating a hydrating barrier. I rotate between them in no particular order; each one supplementing my skin in different ways. My Dry Oil Routine is as follows:

    *Herbivore Lapis Oil: Only used at night. This oil has Azulene which helps irritated skin, reducing the appearance of redness and balancing skin.

    *Perlier Royal Elixir Night Oil:  I use morning &/or night. I have found that it gives my skin a smoother, firmer, rejuvenated look. It optimizes the skin’s own natural levels of collagen, hyaluronic acid and elasticity. I’ve noticed improved results day after day with this product.

    *Kora Organics Noni Oil:  I use morning &/or night.  Beautifully rich and powerful oil that brightens my skin.  This lovely scented oil is full of antioxidants & essential fatty acids to smooth & nourish skin. 

  9. EYE CREAM The eye area is one of the first places to show signs of aging.  As it’s THE MOST thin skin on our bodies it is no wonder it needs proper pampering.  So you best believe I take care of that very delicate area. I cannot live without my eye cream.  I feel like my eye area is very telling about what is going on in my body. It will be the first area to show how I’ve been sleeping, whether I’ve been drinking  enough water, or even if I am stressed.

My Eyecare Routine:

        • Cocokind MyMatcha Stick:  This is a staple in my beauty routine.  I apply this after oil to hydrate and nourish my eyes.
        • Noni Radiant Eye Oil: Only at night. Love this brightening oil!!  Gives my eyes a youthful uplifted appearance.
        • Sio Beauty Eye Lift Patches: A MUST HAVE!!!  Darlings if there is one product that saves me when I am traveling, these eye patches have to be it.  I incorporate them into my skincare routine to de-puff and hydrate my eye area when I anticipate bad sleep or when I have not been drinking enough water.  I put them on at night, go to sleep with them on and wake up bright eyed and puff free.

Well, that’s it! My lifestyle secrets in a nutshell. Whew I may have set a personal record for TTL’s longest blog post (LOL!) but I get asked about my lifestyle routines quite a bit and didn’t want to miss a thing. More than anything on my 41st birthday, I hope that this post inspires all of you darlings to show yourself some love. Thanks for all the birthday wishes and for making every day so special.


  1. Makia Kine' Scott says:

    Thank you Tennille and Happy Birthday Love! I love you! I enjoyed this like I’ve enjoyed your whole entire blog. Thank you for your insight of getting older. I’m now 46 and love the way you view aging. It is truly a blessing to get older. And YES, that is the goal, to see how old we can get and how healthy we can stay. Some days I struggle with this reality and your post today simply made my day. So thank you! I needed to hear that. You are so beautiful inside and out! Keep letting your light shine and inspiring other. You are a blessing! I am so glad I found you! You touch my heart in more ways than you can imagine! Also Happy Anniversary! My hubby and I will be celebrating 25 years together in July!

    • Tennille says:

      Thank YOU so much Makia! Your comments are always so thoughtful and inspire me to keep sharing. I’m so happy this message resonated with you. Thanks for the birthday message. I had a lovely day filled with such sweet comments from all of you. Happy Anniversary to you too!

  2. Teresa says:

    Love your blog! Thank you for providing us with your routines for taking care of you!

    I agree that self-love is vital for living a healthy life. I did not learn that until I was in my thirties. I am still a work in progress on this one.

    Lastly, healthy eating is a life style change. I try to eat clean everyday. I cut out sugar and processed foods. Feel so much better. Also lost over 40 pounds since April 2018. (Weight gain from Cancer medication. Now Cancer free 6 years).

    You are the best inspiration and role model! Thank you! ????

    • Tennille says:

      Wow, congrats on being cancer free for 6 years!! You are AMAZING! I feel so fortunate to be surrounded by a community of amazing women like you who inspire me everyday. Keep showing yourself love every day. You deserve it darling!

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I’m a clean beauty expert, a plant-based recipe guru, a fashion maven, and a mature black woman embracing my natural hair, silver streaks and all.

Welcome, I'm Tennille Murphy